Saturday, May 16, 2009

Sitting Up

Maddi has started to sit up on her own. She's still a little wobbly because she's always trying to bend over to play with her toes, and once her noggin starts going forward, she tends to topple right over. But she loves sitting up like a big girl, and doesn't seem to mind the occasional tumble.

As I'm watching my sweet little girl grow so quickly, I have been consumed with thoughts of how to be the mother that my sweet babies deserve. I am constantly reminding myself that although I am staring at beautiful children, my goal is to raise amazing adults... adults that can thrive with confidence, self esteem, and self motivation. It terrifies me to know that my every act shapes their futures. The scars from my past still haunt me every day. Unkind words and unkind hands have jaded me. The most common sound or object can flood my tainted mind with horrible memories, fear, and insecurity. I know I can't possibly be a perfect parent (See my earlier post about not feeding Drew. Sorry babe!), but I do know that I refuse to mess up on the big things. My children will never doubt my unconditional love for them; I will always sacrifice for their well being over my own, and maybe the memories that we make together will heal my own wounds.


Cari said...

What a big girl! Eden tends to get excited and shoot herself backward. I have to watch her like a hawk. Ah, the joys of growing up.

The Walker Family said...

Wow! Maddi is getting so big! Don't doubt yourself Amanda. You are an awesome mother to your children.