Haunted

I am haunted by memories.
Yes, even at the age of 14, eating meat... tearing into another animal's flesh with my own teeth... gave me the willy's....especially when the animal hung from a tree in our backyard for days. yuck! On this particular night, my punishment for not eating the deer meat was sleeping outside. I was deemed unworthy to be in my home because of my disobedience. Banished to the yard. Like a dog. Not even allowed to sleep in a car and forbidden to leave the yard, a stucco flower box served as my bed on that cold winter night. As I lay there breathing in the smell of fresh dirt, I dreamed of a day when I would have my own home, my own bed, and someone who would realize my worth.
By the grace of God, that day has come, but my happiness is constrained because I'm haunted by memories.
So, today I celebrate starting anew. cutting the binding ties of abuse, and celebrating the gifts that I have been given. I want to allow myself to feel the unbridled joy that I deserve so that I can give my whole self to those I love. Today I start anew.

One in a Million

Maddi: "DOWN!!!!"
Drew: "Maddi look at the camera, right there Maddi, look at Mama Maddi"
For each one of the beautiful pictures that I post, there are a million that look like this :)

Gravity

Having a child... well, more specifically having a girl, has brought gravity to my experiences. Through her innocence, I am learning my own worth. When I look into her eyes and my spirit recognizes hers, I know that I could never harm her or abandon her. I could never damage her or break her heart. When I look into her eyes, I see my noblest calling, my purpose in life. I pray that I will never fail her, so that when gravity one day settles on her, she will have peace and untarnished joy.

A Boy and A Girl

I love these two. I love that they're so different yet bonded by love. their love. my love.

snacktime

My favorite time of the day :)

PJs and Soy

Maddi FINALLY started sleeping through the night. At a year old, we switched to milk instead of formula for her coveted bedtime bottle, and she didn't seem to adjust well. After a few weeks of sleepless nights, we switched her to soy milk and it's been eerily peaceful at night ever since. Now I just have to get use to sleeping again...

Baby Love

This little mama is always cuddling a baby doll or stealing brother's stuffed animals for some extra love.